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I've decided that I probably should have a blog about being busy, eating out, eating healthy, and going to the gym. I only say this because I hardly update with things that relate to my life. I suppose I could more often then not, but I think that I have been in the midst of a dry spell in regards to my creativity, in particular, my writing. In a conversation with my roommate the other day, I expressed my discontent with my lack of desire to write. "I just have nothing to write about!," I said. I suppose that with my previous journal I found myself writing so often as a means to express my dissatisfaction with my previous relationship status (or lack thereof) and my discontent with life. I found that some of my best writing came in the midst of my unhappiness, and since that was the case, now, I've got nothin'. But here I am...trying.

My relationship is about 8 months deep in the "official" status. Time flies. Feels like just yesterday I found someone who made me feel butterflies again, someone who made me smile more often then they made me cry, someone who gave me a will and desire to grow in my faith, become a better sister, friend, daughter, and human being. Just a couple months ago we were discussing how it had been a year since the first time we hung out, it was a surreal moment. I think of my life as it was a year ago. It is incredible that so much time has passed and that so much growth has taken place. However, I am still being humbled and challenged day by day, but in different ways. It is exciting to see the steps that my life has taken and is continuing to take.

My job is crazy. I am teaching only Seniors this year, and so that has been a challenge in and of itself. They're just done with school and ready to graduate, I'm coming to terms with it. Other than that, I started graduate school...exciting. I actually am really excited about my classes. I am getting my Masters in Educational Counseling and on top of that I'm actually acquiring a Counseling credential. I was just telling Lisa the other day that thinking back on all of the crazy stuff I did, I can't believe I'm going back to eventually one day go into school counseling. Funny. No, really...if you know me, you should be laughing. So far the curriculum in my classes has been really interesting...how we respond to stress and loss and brain injuries, crazy interesting stuff. I'm a schoolie at heart though, I admit it, I like school.

The only thing I'm trying to work on is my friendships. I am sucking at friendships lately, mostly because I feel...ehhhh....I dunno. It's kinda hard to explain. I think I said it best when I told Lisa the other day that I'd like to hang out with my friends and just my friends again...not my friends and their boyfriends, at least not all the time. I think its so important to maintain close friendships with your girlfriends when you're in relationships, but most of the time women isolate their friends when they're in relationships. I was guilty of it at first, and now trying to reverse that is tough. I feel like I've drawn so far away from my close friends and because I have such a full schedule at the moment I'm not being very proactive about maintaining those friendships. Plus, I think with everyone close to me either so far away or with their boyfriends or on different schedules most of the time, its just hard to do things. But I have acknowledged that I don't want to be a married woman only hanging out with her friends and their husbands. I'd still like to maintain my unique friendships with them, on a one-on-one basis. I need to work on this--being more proactive and intentional with my friends.

Lastly, I should say I am feeling very overcome with Thankfulness this year. I have truely had such an amazing and blessed year. So many wonderful things have happened over the last 11 months. I am taken aback by all of the incredible ways God has provided for me, my family, and my boyfriend this year. I am looking forward to celebrating all these blessings twice this year--with Mike's family and my own.

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday.

-L

“Now, on the road to freedom, I was pausing for a moment near Temuco and could hear the voice of the water that had taught me to sing." -Neruda